January 24 – Re-writing Personal History: Take some time to remember three (3) of your past personal “tragedies”. Re-envision each of them anew, seeing yourself responding with Nobility and Grace in the face of their pains. Ponder them until you realize what you have learned from them and write those lessons down next to the “tragedies” on your list. Carry this note with you today, re-reading it every hour and actively engaging one of the 3 lessons after doing so. Bonus Activity: Think about your three “crises” again and realize what Good came from them … Choose to be Thank-full for them (and Thank-full that, if you apply their lessons, you will open yourself to new challenges from “the Universe”).

Tragedy, an unexpected great loss, strikes us all at one time or another. It seems to be the way of all sentient beings to cling to pleasures of the present or yearn for desires of the future, and when either is suddenly denied (or even significantly altered), that mishap is experienced as a “catastrophe” or a “crisis”.

From the perspective of those merely witnessing them, some of these tragedies can seem isolated,

… some can seem insignificant,

… and others can even seem humorous.

And yet to those who are living them, they are very real & very potent moments of anguish.

It is not for us to attempt to compare another’s pain to our own. It is not for us to judge whether another’s suffering is “justified” or “reasonable”. If we do so, we are destined to fail in the one opportunity that is available to us – the opportunity to extend the sufferer sincere and heartfelt Compassion.

If we examine the Chinese symbols for the word “crisis”, we can see that it is formed by combining the symbol for “danger” & the symbol for “opportunity”.

And this Truth is embedded within every moment of crisis. Those witnessing others’ suffering are given the afore-mentioned opportunity to extend kindness to the tragic moment’s casualties. And the “victims” of every crisis themselves are given the opportunity to transcend their reasonably self-centered woe by setting the same aside in favor of actively caring for others – thereby transforming their “danger” into an empowering “opportunity”.

While I would never classify pain itself as “good”, and whole I certainly do not go looking to inflict myself with additional discomforts, I do see that every painful moment that comes into my life is not only a call to suffer, but also an opportunity to care for another powerfully. In-deed, even though I cannot control what happens to me, I can control my responses to the same – I can consciously use my painful moments to do powerful good.

I can either see ruined clothes,

… or I can see the chance to be a designated driver.

I can either see a painful breakup,

… or I can see the chance to freely love all of Humanity.

I can either see being abandoned,

… or I can see the opportunity to Love the other anyway.

These choices, or ones very similar to them, are available to us all in every one of our moments of crisis or tragedy or disappointment or frustration. We can always choose to fixate on our own pain and mope or suffer or complain. And we can just as readily (though admittedly not as easily) choose to focus on the other and strive to ease their suffering or bring them Joy.

When my parents divorced in 1985-1986, I could have gone into a shell of anxiety. Instead I embraced the opportunity to become independent (and later interdependent). My “tragedy” strengthened my resolve to grow as a person.

When my own marriage disintegrated in 2000, I could have gone into a shell of depression. Instead I embraced the opportunity to set out and find my Calling; to discover what it was that I could do to best serve Humanity. My “tragedy” strengthened my resolve to awaken to my True Self.

And when my last girlfriend broke up with me (in less-than-respectful fashion) in the early months of 2009, I could have gone into a shell of despair. Instead I embraced the opportunity to extend her kindness anyway; to purposefully self-sacrifice for the betterment of another.  My “tragedy” strengthened my resolve to give the rest of my life to my Calling – to give a similar Love to everyone I encountered for the rest of my days.

As such, while I do not desire to relive my tragedies, and while I wish neither them nor anything like them on anyone else, I am grateful for them nonetheless. I have learned from them, and I have consciously used them to empower my current sense of deep-seated Peace & Joy.

May you all find as much meaning in all your moments of crisis.

See You when I see you …

… and until then, Be Now!

Scaughdt

Filed under: 366 Days of Kindness by Scaughdt