A Tale of Two Paradoxes … 11/10/13
A Tale of Two Paradoxes …
Paradox #01: “If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens when you strap a piece of buttered toast on the back of a cat and then drop it?” ~ Steven Wright (inspired by John Frazee)
Paradox: #02: You are never safer than when choosing to be completely vulnerable … You are never more soundly fortified than the moment after you have dropped all your defenses.
The former paradox provides us with the amusing image of a cat hovering permanently a few inches off the floor …
… while the latter paradox is actually not a paradox at all. It has been championed by the Great Men & Great Women of humanity’s past (Lao Tsu, Buddha, Peace Pilgrim, Rumi, Gandhi & Jesus Christ — just to name a few), and it has been tested thousands of times over the past nine+ years of my own life — proving viable every single time.
You see, every time we are blasted in any way by someone “mean” or “manipulative” or “evil”, we are actually being asked to give these “bad people” what they want more than anything else — our annoyance, our sadness, our anger or our fear.
And when we choose to defend ourselves against their attacks — or to run away, or to sulk, or to attack them in return, we give them that same priceless prize on a silvered platter. By responding in these ways, they have effectively forced you to give them the ver negativity they so desperately desire; making them feel powerful on the short-term, and yet ultimately entrenching the very feelings of low self-esteem & self-loathing that inspired their poor behaviors in the first place.
In this way, your acts of “self defense” actually make your enemies that much stronger, and thus their future attacks much more likely … thereby making your life actually much LESS safe.
On the other hand, consciously responding to such dysfunctions with gentle Kindness is thoroughly unsatisfying to these “villains”. They want your condemnation, and yet receive your compassion instead. They want your hatred, and yet receive your Love instead. They want a victim either cowering or enraged, and yet receive someone behaving valiantly instead.
And, if you decide to persist with such a courageously caring response, these folks will have only one penultimate choice: either leave you alone to find their victim elsewhere … or reawaken to the Kind Self they have forgotten, and start treating you like a Friend.
As such, quite ironically — despite your ego’s fervent desire to believe otherwise, responding to attacks & aggressions with flagrant acts of humble Kindness is your best (if not only) form of effective “self-defense”.
Consider with humility …
… Enact with courage.
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